‘Tis the Season….. for pumpkins and spooks and psycho killers!
We begin the month of October with the first of a series of themed horror nights. This week’s theme….psychotic murderers—the classic slasher flick. “It’s Halloween….everyone’s entitled to one good scare…”
Movie #1: Halloween (1978, with Donald Pleasance, Jamie Lee Curtis) 4.5s all around!
The ultimate Halloween movie from John Carpenter is always a great go-to movie for those wishing to be scared in the dark. We all three just love this movie for a multitude of reasons. It’s simple. It’s subtle. It works. What scares people most are the little bumps in the night…the feeling that you’re being watched…thinking you saw someone in the shadows, but you’re just not sure… There are no insane special effects. This is not the “torture porn” that has become the mainstream vision of contemporary horror flicks. It was obviously low-budget. Heck, the actors all wore their own clothes for the movie. It endures because of its simplicity. The other reason it survives is because, just like with Jaws, John Carpenter’s score for this movie created an auditory memory for the viewer. The music is so indelible… once you’ve heard it, you never forget it. You can just hear that music, and the first thing that comes into your mind—no matter who you are—is Michael Myers in his overalls and white mask lurking in the shadows. Biding his time… just waiting and watching….for you to be completely absorbed in whatever it is that you’re doing…that you don’t see him behind you… raising his hand…
Movie #2: Friday the 13th (1980, with Adrienne King, Betsy Palmer, Kevin Bacon)
Our second slasher film of the night was another total classic—the original Friday the 13th. Where Halloween was a serious, and successful, attempt at a horror film, the Jason Voorhees series is complete and utter spoof—and it’s successful at it. It knows that it’s campy, cheesy, and owns it. The key to watching these slasher films is to make sure you’re a virgin. If you’re a slutty tramp-puppy (girl OR guy!), you’re dead meat—usually while you’re in the middle of being grossly promiscuous. Beware all kind looking middle-aged ladies with huge teeth and ugly sweaters. The violence in this one goes a bit further than that of its inspiration, Halloween. We go from relatively tame chokings and minor stabbings in 1978 to machetes in the chest, axes in the face, and decapitations by boat oar. Of all the slutty teenagers that starred in this film, really only one became a household name. Yes, he of the “always perfect hair”, Mr. “Let’s Dance!” Kevin Bacon. (Jason was digging the daisy dukes….see picture below.) So, remember kids… don’t have sex. Stay pure, my friends…and stay alive.
Ratings: Jason 4; Me and Kathy 3.5s
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| Look at them boys with the Daisy Dukes on! Look at them boys with the Daisy Dukes on! |
Favorite scenes: Halloween—When Michael Myers comes upstairs to kill the slutty blonde cheerleader and she thinks it’s the boyfriend in a sheet playing ghost. He has the guy’s glasses on over the sheet. He’s doing the Darth Vader breathing. Hilarious. And Freaky.
Friday the 13th—When Adrienne King (the last virgin standing) takes Betsy Palmer’s head off with a boat oar. That’s just so over the top.
Eternal Debate: There has been a debate now for decades about what the background noise in Friday the 13th is. You know what I’m talking about—that spooky repetitive whispering that is not entirely clear. We discussed this at length last Tuesday—and via email all week at work. We each have our own take on what it is. Jason believes he’s correct just because he stole it from his 700-page illustrated history of Friday the 13th—“ka ka ka ka ka….ma ma ma ma….” Supposedly to represent dead Jason saying “kill ma”—telling his mother to kill the slutty teenagers. Kathy thinks it’s “ta ta ta ta ta ….pa pa pa pa pa”—not sure what that’s supposed to represent…
Me… and of course, I’m biased… I tend to agree with Vh1’s “I Love the 80s” version of this… “Jiff Jiff Jiff Jiff… Pop Pop Pop Pop” Jason was hungry, and he wanted some popcorn, damn it!
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