After three hectic and rather grueling weeks, I can finally get back to the discussion of cinema at its finest (or worst…)
Movie #1: Walk on the Wild Side (1962, with Jane Fonda, Laurence Harvey, Capucine, Ann Baxter)
Where, oh where, to begin, my friends out there in blog-world. First of all, if you’re going by the title, then this movie is the exact opposite of what it suggests. Brought to our attention by Kathy, supposedly this movie was an interpretation of how Hollywood presented homosexuality. How they got that, I don’t know because there was never anything in this movie to suggest such a relationship. You have Dove Linkhorn (Dove! Who the heck names a boy Dove?!), a cowboy-esque character searching for his long-lost love of 3 years, Hallie (who is now working in a bordello in New Orleans…. Pretty Woman in reverse??). Hallie is controlled by the madame of the Doll House, Jo, played by the ever-impressive Barbara Stanwyck. (This is where the supposed homosexual relationship occurs; however, the only thing you take away is that Jo is determined to keep Hallie at the Doll House for popularity reasons and sheer, utter malice. Sure didn’t look like love.) This movie fails because of a couple reasons: firstly, it is supposed to be a period piece of the early 1930s. The only things accurate were the vehicles. All the clothes, sets, music are so obviously 1960s that it’s hard to remember the real time this is taking place. Also, as you watch the movie, it is blatantly obvious (thus frustratingly confusing) that there is a lot going on that is NOT in the movie. Based on a novel of the same title, research has indicated that there is a lot of sensational material and necessary backstory for the plot that is not in the movie. The story has great potential as a movie, and if done now as a true period piece, it could be really good. If you want to “walk on the wild side”, read the novel.
Things we liked: 1. The acting of the female characters. All the women in this movie were phenomenal, including Joanne Moore, whom I recognized as a character actor on the Andy Griffith Show. 2. The cat fight during the opening credits…(it was a real cat fight, not a fight between 2 chicks.)
Ratings: (These varied. You all know I have little patience with poorly developed movies..) Jason 3.5; Kathy 2.5; Me… 1.5
Movie #2: Bernie (2011, with Jack Black, Shirley MacLaine, and Matthew McConaughey)
Best tag-line from the movie: “Oh shit! Our donkey’s in a ditch.” (spoken by Bernie’s defense lawyer, “Scrappy” Holmes)
Friends and loved ones, this movie is a little treasure. Unassuming, low-budget, no-hype—yet fantastic. We had not really heard about this one, but somehow it was in Jason’s Netflix queue. It’s only an hour and a half and is based on the real-life story of Bernie Tiede from Carthage, Texas (played by Jack Black). Bernie is the town’s sweet and friendly mortician and is the pride and joy of every little blue-haired church lady in town. The movie is filmed like a documentary, telling Bernie’s story of his life in Carthage and his subsequent conviction of murder though the comments of his friends, neighbors, and fellow Carthage citizens. Matthew McConaughey plays the District Attorney that prosecutes Bernie for the murder of local widow Mrs. Nugent (Shirley MacLaine). (We will be honest, Matthew is great in this movie because he’s not playing the “stud” role and is completely believable as a hick, publicity-hungry DA. Kathy didn’t even recognize him until he took off his Stetson in one scene. “What! That’s Matthew What’s-His-Name!”) You root for Bernie the entire movie, and even though he did commit the murder, you just don’t want to see him go to jail for it. (Kathy is sure this will be a future “Snapped” episode on Oxygen!) The townspeople are genuinely sincere, and often extremely hilarious. The soundtrack of this movie is all those great old hymns that us Southern church folk just love. Jason and I kept going, “I remember that one!” (I was singing most of them under my breath, to tell the truth.) This is just a little treasure. It really is. Quaint, funny, sad.
Things We Loved: 1. Jack Black’s performance as Bernie. Usually, he’s the spastic comedian, but in this movie, he’s very subtle. You really get a feel for what Bernie Tiede is like. I also loved Jack Black’s “Baptist preacher” look. 2. The fact that this movie used real Carthage citizens that actually knew Marjorie Nugent and Bernie Tiede. They didn’t try to “dress them up”. They were natural and genuine. Really added substance to this film.
Favorite Quote: “Well, I know the Bible says Jesus turned water into wine, but it didn't say liquor store wine. It had to have been non-alcoholic wine, because it didn't have time to ferment.” (said by church lady during Bible Study… I personally know a lot of Southern church ladies that believe this with their heart and soul. Bless ‘em.)
Ratings: We all give this a 4, hands down. Now go rent it!
Da da Da!!!! Bonus movies!!!!
As I had to skip a few weeks, here’s a run-down on what we did watch (due to schedules, there were 2 weeks we skipped movie nite.)
**Albert Nobbs (2011, with Glenn Close, Mia Wasikowska)—Jason 4; Kathy 3.5; Me 3
**Airport 1977 (1977, with Lee Grant, Jack Lemmon, Joseph Cotten, Christopher Lee, Olivia de Haviland)—Jason , Kathy, and Me 3.5s all around
**What Ever Happened to Aunt Alice? (1969, with Geraldine Page, Ruth Gordon)—Jason 4; Kathy and Me 3
**Night of the Lepus (1972, with Janet Leigh, Rory Calhoun, Stuart Whitman, and dozens of bunnies)
Remember all those bunny massacres we had a few weeks back….The bunnies got even!
Cheesy, low-budget, 1970s horror flick that would be a perfect “SyFy Channel movie of the week” if done now, Night of the Lepus is as it sounds. Genetically mutated bunnies become humongous monsters and go around chewing up all the people. For all you organically minded nutrition nuts out there, I guess these could be considered “free range” bunnies. The pictures say it all, my friends…
 |
| The bunnies are coming! |
 |
| The bunnies are here!!!!! |
 |
| "We represent...the Lollipop Kids, the Lollipop Kids, the Lollipop Kids..." We were obsessed with this guy's head... |
Ratings: Are you kidding…. (I actually fell asleep at the big “electrocution of the monster-bunnies” scene)
Favorite Line: “That’s the way I wanna go, man! I wanna be ‘fluffied’ to death.” (spoken by Kathy when the bunnies were terrorizing the town.)
